Enjoying family

My beautiful grandmother!

The road this time has brought me home, to where I grew up. I have been enjoying my grandparents, and family. My boys do not want to leave! lol They have spent so much of their life away from family, that they really do appreciate being here. It reminds me, of what I often take for granted. Life is so fragile, and there is no promise of tomorrow. Your family may not be around you, but if possible take the time to connect with them. They may or may not show it, or say it, but it does touch their heart. Even the coldest of ones.

I am so thankful for the time, I get to spend with the beautiful people who invest in my life. There is so much you learn about yourself with your family (good and even bad) and even appreciate more when you are older. For that wisdom, I am thankful!

I am one happy & blessed woman!

photo by Carla Naron

The SOURCE of my JOY

I Chose JOY!

The source of my JOY can be summed up in one powerful word-

It may be infinitely worse to refuse to forgive than to murder, because
the latter may be an impulse of a moment of heat; whereas the former
is a cold and deliberate choice of the heart.

George MacDonald

I did not harden my heart.

It is incredibly hard

for some to understand

how I can

FORGIVE

{yes even the adultress and her pride}

AND be

so thankful

and full of

JOY.

Forgiveness is my weapon.

My pain is valid

and yet

{Forgiveness is the scent that the rose leaves on
the heel that crushes it.}

Forgiveness does not release the offender from walking away

without any

consequences to their choices

consequences are a natural part of life...

however

FORGIVENESS

does release and empower

the one forgiving

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

-Gandhi

It is a daily CHOICE to forgive.

I know its not easy,

but its possible!

Never does the human soul appear so strong as when is foregoes revenge and dares to forgive an injury.

E.H. Chapin

Because I chose this, JOY happens naturally.

I find favor in places I never knew.

I find favor in the eyes

of

My Love,

{the one that matters most}

True Love NEVER FAILS.

who am I talking to??

i have to go here;

i'm sorry if it may be too much

however this is not about you,

heck its not about me....

and yet it is

This is exactly why I must tell my story.

You are why I must tell my story.

For far too long, you have had your own way.

all the while hindering your own blessing

oh yes you may think its all so good now

but deep down you know,

you KNOW

you

have traded a promise for a lie...

trying to justify

trying to convince others

yet they know

even

they know!

and for those who have accepted the lie,

they do not truly love you.

if they did they would FIGHT for you.

for the truth,

for your freedom!

you have

thoughtlessly traded

your birthright

blind,

lacking in understanding

of what you have given up!

you sold your birthright Esau!

while you have proudly put on a show for the public

pretending,

yet knowing

that you

are settling for an imitation....

though you don't deserve it.

I will fight for your destiny,

because someone fought

for my destiny!

LIKEWISE

where my story left off

I was so close to settling for an imitation.

I deserve better!

I'm so much happier on my own!

I want to be happy!

AND FREE

God doesn't want me to not be happy!

Its time to let go & move on!

There is someone else who will be better!

ME ME ME ME ME ME ME

THIS IS WHERE I WAKE UP.

THIS IS WHERE {THE LORD}

asks

me

the question.

"Do you LOVE me?"

my reply: {of course i do!}

"Do you LOVE me?"

again my reply: {you know I do!}

He softly calls my name....

"emmy"

"Do you LOVE me?"

My heart breaks and tears flow. Because I know what He's asking.

And Because I do love Him.

I sobbingly reply: I can't do it without you Lord.

He holds me close, kisses my face and whispers "I know".

not by my might, but BY YOUR SPIRIT, says the Lord

This photo was taken last year.

It is extremely significant.

It is God showing me WHO he is.

It is one of a series of many prayers being answered.

It is the promise of restoration.

It is the representation of TRUE LOVE.

Before you say or think awwww..

I must tell you this is not that kind of love story!

I wrote this post then

The quote

We are responsible for the stories we tell

& for those we choose not tell.

Our silences speak volumes

about whom & what we value.

-Rabbi SE Sasso

It is my time to tell my story, Gods story!!

My silence then, was only the beginning

of the MOST beautiful LOVE STORY.

It will now speak of whom and what I value.

Two years ago,

the most beautiful thing

happened to me!!!

Adultery

yes i said it was a beautiful thing!

ok not actually

but what came from it was!

The Creator of Love,

showed me the TRUTH of LOVE,

_I thought_

adultery

killed

my marriage.

{insert evil laugh}

IT thought it

destroyed our lives.

and sat laughing at our pain-

delighting in its lust and seduction-

telling lies,

misrepresenting

what Love is,

an imitation

selfish to its very core.

It sold us lies,

that we bought.

_temporarily_

BUT

IT DID NOT.

WIN

{insert JOY & DANCING}

it ONLY MADE

EVERYTHING BETTER!!!!

OH Yah IT DID!

yes, you can believe it.

THIS death

was actually LIFE!

I wouldn't change a moment

since it was exposed.

It contains a strength

that refuses to be silent!

LET THERE BE LIGHT!

Now you may think, this love story

is about my husband and I....

well not really.

Its about the Creator of Covenant.

because he understands how we are made

My Love story,

is that of He,

the

One that is jealous of my LOVE

He loved me in a way

that I can often not comprehend

WHY? OH why?

would this beautiful Creator

value me?

Broken, Flawed & Unfaithful

yes unfaithful to Him....

THAT I AM NO MORE.

the CREATOR showed me

the power of Love

that can destroy strongholds,

that can destroy lies,

that can overcome,

anything.

yes even that!

yes even THIS!

Before you let your mind wander

let me clarify

My unfaithfulness

didn't come in the form of a flesh

it came in a

much more

devious

fashion...

dressed

to the nines..

disguising itself as freedom...

yet it was only

leading me

toward

my

captivity.

Stay tuned

This story will be continued....